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The RDMA Activity Performance Counter can give you some useful information
RDMA Accepted Connections will increase for each new connection. The Picture show a lab system with a RoCE Error. RDMA Accepted Connections will normally only change if you move VMs (SOFS), disable/enable pNIC/vNIC or reboot a Node.
The picture show that I have thousands of Accepted Connections and after just a few seconds I have 4 Accepted Connections. With no change in the Cluster.
Show the Active Connections on each vNIC/pNIC to see the connect use the "netstat -xan"